Ok, the first article says “Millennials killed the paper napkin industry” then says they’re using paper towels instead

WTF is the difference between a paper napkin and a paper towel? I thought they were the same thing? 😂

Hubert, did your mummy not tell you not to be so argumentative?

glass seals

Maybe napkins is some kind of influencer or something

I wouldn’t punch him with that crash helmet on

Wait, sorry, that’s his fucking hair

DON’T STOP SKANKIN

Right, I don’t care who the fuck you are or if you’re some kind of NHS consultant, if someone phones you. PHONES YOU! And tells you something like this, despite clear warnings from every bank and banking app you ever had not to believe them, and you believe it, I’m not going to feel sorry for you or blame your other banking app

You might’ve grown up thinking that was a proper bakery but it definitely isn’t

You’re absolutely the exception, not the rule

Take your tiny-penis truck and leave, there’s a good fella

Unless one lives in one of the 194 of the 195 countries on the planet, which is extremely fuckin likely

That, and also the mayor of Paris is on a massive anti-SUV bender at the moment, hiking up parking charges to discourage people from driving them

The judge has probably been told to send a message.

You don’t. Fuckin. Need. An SUV. You. Cunt

I had no idea people didn’t do this! First notification I get from an app that isn’t some form of messaging, straight to settings and turn off notifications.

People are getting notifications from news apps. Apart from actual World War Fuckin Three, what possible news story could be worth being disturbed by your phone for?!?

I think the outrage is due to the fact it was a cyclist. You can try driving round Paris and it’ll take years off your life.

Cycling is a whole different story. Drivers respect cyclists and give them a wide berth; they won’t overtake unless they can leave at least a metre. It’s just the done thing

Damn right this cunt should have the book thrown at him

artisan

Supermarket

You may only pick one

Do yous not have proper bakeries?

A french bakery is called a boulangerie, because for centuries bread was prepared in a bowl, or boule. That gave the loaves a particular round shape, like an inverted bowl

Amazingly, it wasn’t until the late 17th century that someone thought, “You know what, I could make this into different shapes, like maybe a stick shape!”

You can say 40%. The numerically literate, non-credit-card owners will understand

I commented once about what a ripoff credit cards are and how they haven’t really taken off in other countries because they’re basically a scam.

I got verbally attacked by people telling me how great they are because they give you cashback

They genuinely thought the credit card company was giving them free money lmao

Basically the financial wherewithal of Liz fucking Truss

Fantastic news for nature documentary makers who are married to taxidermists

I would also mention that you need to spend quite a bit of your time blocking Japanese cartoon communities lol

Christ on a bike, you’d think they’d give it a more succinct name

(Either leave a blank line between lines, or put two spaces at the end of each word)