[Image description: image of text which reads “I like when men explain basic things to me because in my mind it’s not mansplaining, it’s more like when a toddler is really excited to tell you about dinosaurs and you’re like that’s right cutie! You’re so smart!! Only one of us is being condescending and it’s me”, to which Shawn replies “if you have to announce when you’re condescending, you’re doing it wrong.”

OP replies “that’s a great observation, Shawn! Great job!” with a heart emoji]

  • 1984@lemmy.today
    39·
    3 days ago

    I wonder how many of those guys are actually trying to put women down, and how many are just trying to be helpful and talk to another human being.

    • apotheotic (she/her)@beehaw.orgEnglish
      19·
      3 days ago

      Its both, except in the case of this post where the person is clearly being snarky and trying to put this woman down.

      Most mansplaining is a man trying to be helpful. The issue arises in that they try to be helpful in situations where, if it was another man, they wouldn’t try to be helpful, because they’d assume the man already knew the thing.

      An obviously stretched out example, but, if someone was dreadfully thirsty and I, out of the absolute kindness of my heart, tried to offer them advice like “Gosh, that sounds awful. I’m so sorry. Have you tried drinking water? I’ve been thirsty before and water always fixes me right up”, I’m sure we’d all agree this is misplaced advice and probably reflects on my perception (or presumptions) of their intelligence.

    • JackbyDev@programming.devEnglish
      9·
      3 days ago

      Less than you’d think. While some people definitely do over explain things from excitement and talkativeness, it’s easy to recognize when someone is being an ass.

      • LallyLuckFarm@beehaw.orgOP
        4·
        3 days ago

        (this reply added almost purely for comedic value because of the thread)

        When we’re talking about the countable number of something, “fewer” is a more appropriate word to choose; when it’s more conceptual then “less” is a better option. A good way to recognize which to choose is by examining the prompting question. In the parent comment you replied to, the question was “how many guys?” which alludes to a set number. Had they asked “how much of this” then there’s not a way for us to know the count. As an example: I could have used fewer words for this reply but I would have to be less pedantic.

  • knokelmaat@beehaw.org
    15·
    3 days ago

    Honestly, I am often a passionate little toddler explaining stuff that amazed me when I learned it.

    There was an issue around male behaviour at an inclusive boxing gym where I train, and I was suddenly super conscious about this and afraid I was part of the problem. But luckily I had some super nice conversations with some of the women training there that explained me that this was not an issue. Of course I am no saint and have also made mistakes, but being passionate about stuff is not the same as mansplaining, and luckily others are able to tell the difference.

    Something I did learn from that situation, is how women / non-men are often given less space to speak, and as a man who also loves to speak, I’ve been more conscious in giving space to everyone. Which is in fact a nice experience, as you learn way more about others and the world when you’re not talking :). It’s a peaceful experience.

  • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    13·
    2 days ago

    Fine that’s cool, be condescending, because tbh you’re right that’s exactly what I’m doing, it’s my ADHD and I’m too excited about this thing I just learned about to notice that you’re trying to be mean to me, so it’s a win-win really.

  • BearOfaTime@lemm.ee
    18·
    3 days ago

    So Ellie is the condescending one here, not the person supposedly “mansplaining”.

    Or at least that’s what she seems to be saying.