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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 30th, 2023

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  • I need to do better because I feel the lack of it, isn’t this valid enough?

    Like I said, anything that motivates you to improve your life is a great thing imo. So yeah, if you feel unfulfilled, of course that’s a valid sign that you should absolutely do more challenging or meaningful things. My point is just that when you compare yourself to others, you’re comparing your whole self with their public self. You know your own doubts, insecurities, etc, but not theirs. So it’s not a totally fair comparison. In the same way, other people could look at you doing well academically and envy your position, because they don’t know that despite that success you are feeling unsatisfied.






  • Hey OP, I hear your frustration. Sometimes, she will simply not be into you like that, and that’s okay. But there are concepts that can significantly improve your dating life if you learn them.

    The most important thing is to intentionally be romantic. You have to flirt. The way you describe this interaction doesn’t sound very flirty. She was nice and you had a good conversation? That’s great, but she could probably get a similar experience from a friend.

    Flirting is about making things exciting. Taking a risk and making your intentions known is often attractive. Think playful banter. Having a low stakes, interview-style conversation is just boring for most women.

    Practical ways to be more flirty:

    • choose a venue where you can sit side by side
    • maintain great eye contact when she’s talking
    • don’t rush to fill every silence, let it breathe
    • use statements more, rather than just questions
    • respectful and appropriate use of touch
    • playfully challenge or disagree with her at times
    • humor is great, but don’t constantly joke around

    Basically, being a nice guy with a good job is great, and actually a prerequisite for many women to date you. But it’s not inherently sexy. You gotta learn how to embrace your romantic side to show them you’re capable of that, too.