Oh my god this would work

Don’t make us send the gnarly weapons!

Gay robots.

Furiously parses every word of your sentence, with a special minute examination of the emoji

YoUr BoOtStRaPs!

It’s not wasted, it’s practice!

Don’t let that part of your brain that wants to inhibit you win on this one. You tried, but the dude wasn’t available, so it doesn’t even count! Now you get to try again!

A friend gave me an invitation a few months ago but when I tried to join they were like, “You know what? Not you.”

So now I’m too petty to join.